Sunday, May 03, 2015

Mom, You Are Right Again!

It's been an entire month since I last posted - where do the days go?  They go into the making of 'Finding Our Way'. There is hardly a moment when I am not absorbed with this upcoming photo installation with its roundtable discussions - and its fundraising opportunities.
This week I hit the wall. At five months out. If Mom were around, she would be asking, "Do you want to kill yourself over this?" And she would say, "You've done this all your life, Mary Margaret. You wear yourself out." Mom would recount her memories of my school years - from first grade straight through my senior year in high school - when she would periodically keep me home from school so I could sleep for an entire day. "You run and run until you are exhausted." My friend Sally recently stepped in for Mom. She tells me the same thing and she's done a lot of watching me in action for the last 40+ years.
I think I tipped over the edge ten days ago, when I started to fund raise for 'Finding Our Way.' I began making appointments and my calendar is filled with lunches, early evening glasses of wine and even a breakfast coffee or two. When I do talk with potential contributors, they are enthusiastic about the project, offer ideas and more contacts, but so far no one has smiled and said, "Yes, I will help. Where do I send a check?"
Long ago picture of me photographing during dinner at Shadowlawn.
Is that Mom in the lower righthand corner?
After a couple of 'asks', all the symptoms of an irregular heart beat took hold in my body. Day after day, all this past week. So I took the heart medication I hold in reserve and called my cardiologist. I certainly take things to heart, don't I? It's been a rough week. And I know I am way past simple tiredness. I've got to forego fundraising for a while.
Today, I've not left the house and began to cancel and reschedule most of this week's meetings. Not that this means I'll be idling and resting in bed. No. Patsy's son Joe arrives from NY on Tuesday to help us cull images from her boxes of negatives and photographs. I asked him to come sometime in May and of course, I am more than happy that he will be here to help pull this show together. In preparation, I am resting all day today and tomorrow, so that I have the energy to work with him midweek.
Once again, I have done this to myself. This life long habit of mine may be more serious at nearly 73?

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